First of all...setting up a design for this thing was HARD. I'm pretty indecisive...couple that with tons of choices and you've got a disaster lol. My friend Eric insisted I blog throughout medical school to keep everyone informed on my education and life, so I one-upped him and started early :P jk Eric...

Yes, I'm headed to medical school in the fall...most likely. It's a very hard decision to make. I've worked extremely hard for it through the past four years, been to hell (and still on my way back), and the first day gets closer and closer and I'm getting more and more nervous. I have input coming in from every direction, but in the end it's really just between me and the Lord. My end goal is dermatology - I love the field. It's amazing, fun, competitive to get into, but totally awesome to practice. It also gives me a very flexible schedule - something that is very important to me. I hope to have a family one day and I really do not want to be the mom that's never there. That touches on one of the reasons I wouldn't go to med school...it would be hard for whatever guy that would be crazy enough to marry me to build a family, work out a schedule, parent kids, and really just get through it. That and I know that in the church it's generally frowned upon for women to work outside the home. And I already had a guilt complex to begin with...

BUT...on the other hand, I've been told to use my talents...one of them that I see is intelligence. I would feel like I was wasting myself doing something else. And there would always be that nasty little voice reminding me I "could've" been a doctor. I hate that voice lol. That, and there's not even a guy I'm seriously dating right now, so I would hate to throw away an opportunity on a guy that I don't even know exists. I've also always been pretty independent...I like to know I can take care of myself and my own, at least financially.

So although those decisions are coming up quick, I'd rather blog about something else :P I've had a rough couple of weeks for various reasons, but I do see the little good things that have helped to make them much better. Tuesday before last, my sister Danielle took me out to Gruene Hall. (Gruene, Texas is possibly the most adorable small town in Texas and has an awesome band that plays there every Tuesday called Two Tons of Steel...so they call it "Two Ton Tuesdays" and it's been going on for about 15 years now.) Anyway I was feeling down, but she managed to convince me and I really wasn't sure I was going to have a good time...but I'm so glad I was wrong lol. Dani went to dance with her friend Albert (they're amazing dancers btw) and I knew Albert would dance with me eventually but I was pretty content to sit and listen to the music. So while sitting, I started chatting with the girl next to me who turned out to be from San Antonio too, went to a neighboring high school, and was my same age. That would be Kris, and she's pretty awesome. Kris then proceeded to introduce me to her friends, which included guys that could dance! Her friend Seth then asked me to dance and taught (I was re-learning) me how to dance...mostly two step. I really forgot how much I enjoyed dancing til that night. I didn't even notice the time pass! Afterwards Dani and I got food at Sonic, which was run by possibly the most incompetent teenagers ever lol, and then headed home.

Other highlights would include this last weekend I spent in the DFW area... I got to see WICKED!!! It was so amazing! I absolutely loved it. I actually drove up early, separately from my family, and stayed with my friend Alicia to visit. I was going to go riding at Ashley's place but she had too many riders that weekend :( Sad times... Ashley is an amazing rider and her family owns an amazing facility with amazing horses and last semester she was kind enough to let me come ride to keep me from going insane. Riding is very therapeutic for me...keeps the stress down :) There really is a breath of heaven between a horses ears...except when you're flying between them to land in the dirt - which has happened to me lol. Anyway Alicia, Maggie and I had a great time together on Friday - including another Fuzzy's Friday! It was good to see everyone again...the end of school got crazy and it seems like our last Fuzzy's Friday was a long time ago... Saturday was Wicked, which was amazing. We went with my sister Rachel's inlaws and then went out to dinner and played games afterward. Sunday my family went home and I went back to Alicia's. Alicia and I later went to Victoria's Secret semi-annual sale (a long-standing tradition for us lol) where I found the perfect pair of panties for me...they say "have fun" on the butt lol. (Having fun is my goal for the summer...through various trying things, it's actually become a rather difficult thing for me to do...but more on that later.) I also went and said goodbye to Dr. Harrington's office and took Dr. Harrington chocolates...which she loves. She always says she runs on chocolate and diet coke lol. (And it's true...) Dr. Harrington and her involvement in my life deserves it's own post so I'll save that for a more boring day. Needless to say...she's awesome.

I drove home Monday evening and went to Two Ton again on Tuesday...and had a lot of fun again. Except when Seth punched me in the jaw with his elbow...which he called an "accident" :P No, he really didn't mean to, but I enjoy giving him a hard time about it. I never knew dancing could be so dangerous lol...I'll start carrying my medical insurance card on me when I dance with Seth! Yesterday was...difficult...but I made it through and today I have to do a drivers safety course for the accident I was in on my bday. :( Boo! Yeah, when you rear-end someone in Texas, you get a ticket, just fyi for all you non-Texas resident readers. Oh yeah and now I have to get a different car...apparently there was more damage than we though originally (the accident was in December) and so my dad decided it would be best for me to get something else that I don't have to baby while I'm in med school. Unfortunately, that probably means taking out a car loan :/ I'm not ready to be a big kid :P Anyway, that's all for now folks, I've really got to get on this driver safety course so I can go to midnight rodeo tonight!!!

Much love :)